Earlier this year in this space, I wrote of plans to attend a program on being a friend to someone with dementia scheduled at Emmaus Public Library. Unfortunately for me, or so I thought at the time, the program was postponed and I was out of luck for a topic.

Fast forward to last month and, fortunately for me, luck was on my side, and I took my seat for the rescheduled presentation.

To revisit information gathered for the earlier effort, worldwide estimates are 78 million people will be diagnosed with dementia by 2030 and 139 million by 2050, according to statistics from Alzheimer’s Disease International. A lesson reinforced in the program, Alzheimer’s disease, although the most common, is not the only type of dementia. Other types include Lewy Body Dementia, frontotemporal dementia, vascular dementia, alcohol-induced dementia, Parkinson’s-related dementia and more.

Another lesson relearned and worth noting is dementia affects each person differently, and that includes those who care for those with dementia.

Among those attending the presentation with me was a woman who visits her mother-in-law weekly to help organize her medications, a couple who frequently travel to a nearby state to visit a friend diagnosed with dementia and his wife, who is also his primary caregiver along with a staff member who cared for those with dementia in an assisted living facility.

We shared stories, offered strategies, sympathized and empathized with each other’s concerns and, on a personal note, learned a great deal, especially from presenter Carol Frawley, LPN, CDP, community relations director of CarePatrol Senior Care Advisory.

Lessons of friendship included:

• In conversation, avoid quizzing the person. Do not say “Do you remember when x, y or z?” because it is not likely he or she will or does.

• Speak directly and in straightforward statements.

• Be aware of your feelings, and try to be positive, relaxed, reassuring and friendly.

• Suggest consulting a medical professional if you notice changes in your friend. Help is best started early.

• Always treat them with respect, as you would any friend or anyone.

Perhaps an observation from Frawley will stick with you as it did for me.

“They will know you’re someone who cares about them and came to see them,” she said, adding, “You are creating moments for them and memories for you.”

We all can use friends like that.

April Peterson

editorial assistant

East Penn Press

Salisbury Press