Dear Jacquelyn,

I like to think I have fairly good table manners, but mishaps do happen. All sorts of blunders occur such as accidental spills and dealing with gristle. I am not always sure about how to graciously recover and regain my composure. Can you offer some advice on how to recover from some typical dining faux pas?

Dear Reader,

Dining blunders happen to everyone.

It doesn’t mean you have poor table etiquette. It simply means accidents happen. The most important thing is to know how to graciously recover and regain your composure.

The most common mishap is an accidental spill. When this happens, set the glass upright and apologize. It’s not necessary to make it the main focus of the conversation.

If you spilled someone else’s drink, apologize and offer to buy them a new one.

If you are the victim of a spill, try to be gracious and compassionate. Handle the spill and forget about it.

Gristle is definitely something we all deal with at some time. Protocol suggests the way things go in is the way they come out. If it went in with a utensil, it comes out on a utensil; if it went in with your fingers, it comes out with your fingers. You may also excuse yourself from the table and remove the gristle in the privacy of the restroom.

More common mishaps include dropped utensils, someone using your bread plate and handling awkward foods. When faced with these dining faux pax, there are simple solutions.

A dropped utensil stays on the floor. Ask the server for another utensil.

If someone accidentally uses your bread plate, say nothing and use the side of your dinner plate.

Lastly, when you are served something you do not know how to tackle such as mussels, when in doubt, copy what others are doing.

These are only a few of the most common faux pas people make when dining. Relax. They are totally recoverable.

Respectfully Yours,

Jacquelyn

Have a question? Email: jacquelyn@ptd.net. Jacquelyn Youst is owner of the Pennsylvania Academy of Protocol, specializing in etiquette training.

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