Dear Jacquelyn,

During the holidays, things get fairly crowded and looking for a parking space is difficult. There are times people appear to be leaving but sit in their cars. Is there a polite way to ask another driver in this situation if they will be leaving the spot?

Dear Reader,

It tries our patience to wait for someone to leave a parking spot if they’re taking their sweet time.

It’s no secret that manners tend to break down when cars are involved. Often times, it’s because people can’t communicate effectively and judgments are made based on actions.

If you haven’t missed the window of opportunity to ask before they got in their car, roll down your window and without having to shout, say something like, “Will you be leaving?”

If you weren’t able to ask before they got in the car, very simply, if you can make eye contact and wave, ask, “Excuse me, will you be leaving?” If they reply by letting you know they are not leaving yet or it will be a while, say thank you and drive away. You have just saved yourself some time.

When someone takes a long time to get going, they could very well be going through a checklist that goes along with today’s conveniences.

They could possibly be getting ready with their GPS or connecting the Bluetooth. It can take several minutes for some people to get underway.

In such situations, I would recommend you wait for a while but move away and find another spot in case you’re about to cause a traffic block.

It is likely most people who see another car hovering near their soon-to-be-vacant space know the deal. There is a good chance they will be accommodating because they have been in your situation.

Saying, “Excuse me” or “Mind if I ask” makes the question more polite and, as always, say it with a smile.

Respectfully Yours,

Jacquelyn

Have a question? Email: jacquelyn@ptd.net. Jacquelyn Youst is owner of the Pennsylvania Academy of Protocol, specializing in etiquette training.

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