Since my ex had surgery, he has been incommunicative. I have been relying on his mother to give me updates. This is a little awkward. Since he went into the hospital on the fourth day of Musikfest, there have been no visits for our son, James.

Some time ago, when I dreamed of having a social life and maybe even a job with Sunday hours, I had asked my attorney what my recourse was if my ex canceled his weekly visit with James. The response made me laugh.

“If he cancels the visit, he should pay for a babysitter,” I was told.

LOL. He wouldn’t even give me $10 when one of his checks did not clear. Essentially if money isn’t enforced by a court order, he isn’t paying.

Anyway, I would rather have my son at home. I have the writing work, which I can do almost anywhere anytime. The only thing I lack is a social life.

Mostly I don’t mind. I am an introvert to begin with. But still, it would be nice to be able to make social plans once in a while.

Another effect of his father’s hospitalization is that James has been more anxious and clingy latterly than usual. This is understandable, given the circumstances. Still, I am looking forward to school starting up again, because I think he could use the distraction. I am planning to let his teacher and guidance counselor know about our current situation, so they can keep an eye on his anxiety, too.

Of course I am concerned about my ex being in the hospital for so long, but mostly from the perspective of the time he has not been about to spend with our child.

Everything else will work out. I believe it, even if I can’t feel it right now.