Q: Our elementary school son is really into computers. While I want to encourage him to pursue this interest as a career, I don’t want him spending too much on the computer.

The Family Project panel agreed that setting limits is key.

“It’s important that kids have balance and have limits around technology. Make sure he gets outside and reads books. While it’s not good to take away part of their world, you can make rules like ‘No screen time at the dinner table.’ It’s good for him to develop those skills,” said panelist Denise Continenza.

“Social activities in which he actually gets to play with other children should be encouraged instead of spending all his time playing games or using computers for these purposes,” agreed panelist Wanda M. Arroyo.

“Technology is an important part of life. Help him to learn to use computers in a healthy way. Tell him, ‘Let’s learn more about computers together.’ Start from the beginning. Explain that you can put a search for something innocent and find something weird stuff. Let him know he can come to you with questions,” said panelist Mike Daniels.

“You have a small window of opportunity. When he is more tech savvy than you, it will be too late. Share your values with him now and make it part of your lives by modeling good behavior. Say, ‘It’s 8 p.m., time to turn off our computer,” added panelist Chad Stefanyak.

“Make it a rule that he must use technology in your presence and not alone in his room,” suggested Continenza.

“Set up family ‘technology hours,’ perhaps from 4 to 6 p.m. for everyone to work on their computers. Then everyone puts them away for dinner,” agreed Daniels.

Tell him, ‘We can hang out in the living room and be on our computers.’ Make it a social thing. Ask him to show you something on the computer and his face will light up. It’s such a big deal at that age to be the expert,” Stefanyak added.

“Make sure you check what sites he goes on,” said panelist Pam Wallace.

“Trust your gut. A good parent wants to keep their child safe,” Daniels agreed.

Arroyo noted it is a bit early to be worrying about a career: “It is important for your child to develop an ample horizon of opportunities to explore and not only with computers. He needs to be exposed to many things and later he will be able to decide what he would like to pursue in the future. He is too young to do that right now.”

This week’s panel: Chad Stefanyak, school counselor; Denise Continenza, extension educator; Mike Daniels, LCSW, Psychotherapist; Pam Wallace, child welfare community advocate, and Wanda M. Arroyo, former teacher and school administrator.

Have a question? Email: jhines@cscinc.org

The Family Project is provided by Community Services for Children’s Project Child.

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