GUEST VIEW: Everyone has a story
I have been in jail.
I spent a winter night sitting on the cold floor of a makeshift shelter for homeless folks who were wrapped up in sleeping bags.
I rode in a car for more than an hour transporting an unfamiliar heroin addict who was going through withdrawal.
I befriended a homeless man who lived on a cemetery bench and invited him to our house for a meal.
I accompanied a Mennonite farmer through an ankle-deep muddy field and ruined a good pair of shoes.
Why do I do such odd things?
Because people and everyday life fascinate me. Because everyone I encounter and every experience I have tells a story.
When friends ask why I never run out of ideas for my columns or features, I tell them as long as people exist, I will find the ingredients for a story.
In my eyes, nobody is boring. Even folks who insist they are not at all exciting really are. At least to me.
Of course, not everyone is interested in hearing the stories of others. Some individuals are more inclined to want to discuss their own lives.
And, as we know, we cannot listen if we are doing the talking.
Fortunately people open up to me, perhaps because I am a good listener and allow them to talk without judging or interrupting them.
Several friends have expressed amazement when they realize they just shared their entire life stories, without any prompting from me.
On interviews, the tendency to overshare can get awkward, however, and I have had to steer a few folks back to the topic I came to discuss.
One man, whom I was interviewing about a school he founded, suddenly switched gears and began telling me details of how his marriage dissolved.
Decades ago, another man started to confess he had murdered someone! Whether he was delusional or honest, I wanted no part of that story.
Actually, I just wanted to escape.
Most people’s stories, of course, are not intended for publication. They are a way for folks to shape their views of themselves and share their identities.
All of us learn more about ourselves and what we view as meaningful through our stories.
Telling one’s story in a safe and supportive environment can increase self-esteem. The process can be healing. It can reconcile the past.
Stories are powerful because they can create empathy and a human connection.
Sharing one’s story can build bonds and inspire listeners or readers.
Through hearing the stories of others, including older relatives, we can be encouraged and empowered. Stories also reveal our hearts.
I truly believe everyone has an important story. Every life story is worth telling.
When people are willing and even eager to share their stories, they are really sharing their lives. They are giving us a special gift.
We need to pay attention and take the time to listen.
Bonnie Lee Strunk