Don’t want to see “A Christmas Carol” or the “Nutcracker” this year?

Civic Theatre of Allentown has an alternative: “Every Christmas Story Ever Told (And Then Some),” through Dec. 18, Theatre 514, Allentown.

The play, written by Michael Carleton, James Fitzgerald and John K. Alvarez and directed by Civic Theatre of Allentown Associate Artistic Director-Production Manager Will Morris, spoofs all the major Christmas themes in its 140-minute run time (including intermission).

Production Designer is Paul Halada. Scenic Artist is Jan Joyce. Music Director is Rebecca Pieper. Sound Designer is Randall Utsch. Properties are by JoAnn Wilchek Basist and Maria Defebo-Edwards.

There are three actors; Pat Kelly, Syd Stauffer and Cheryl Moritz, with occasional participation by Assistant Stage Manager Mattie Cox.

Kelly opens with a few lines from “A Christmas Carol.” He is told that it has become overdone. Of course, it’s playing right across the street in the Nineteenth Street Theatre.

Kelly is reluctant at first, but he soon joins Stauffer and Moritz in dancing and rapid costume changes. Images and film clips are projected on a screen at the back of the stage, including a vintage Norelco electric razor commercial.

Gustav the Green Nosed Reindeer is introduced as an alternative to Rudolph. The tradition of fruitcake is honored in a game show, with the third panelist chosen from the audience.

“The Nutcracker” is saluted with an inflatable lawn ornament. As it inflates, the cast tells bad Christmas jokes: “What do you call a snowman with no arms or legs?” “A snowball.”

There is even a bit of education about the history of St. Nicholas and the Christmas traditions of Sweden, Iceland, England, the Netherlands and Australia.

The trio covers, in frenetic fashion: The Grinch, “A Charlie Brown Christmas,” the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, and “Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.” Santa and his elves also make an appearance.

The second act is a mashup of the play, “A Christmas Carol,” and the movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life” (1946). This includes the non-speaking Ghost of Christmas Future communicating via Charades. There are even references to “The Wizard of Oz” and Elon Musk.

If all this seems like a bit much, well, Christmas can be that way, too. So if you want to see people rushing and joking around even more than you do this season, this is the play for you.

“Every Christmas Story Ever Told (And Then Some),” 8 p.m. Dec. 15, 16, 17; 3 p.m. Dec. 18, Theatre514, 514 N. 19th St., Allentown. Tickets: box office; https://civictheatre.com/ ; 610-433-8903.