BY SARIT LASCHINSKY

Special to The Press

Lehigh Valley Health Network recently conducted an educational webinar titled “Because They’re Kids: Back to School Safety - Resiliency and Kids,” the first of its two-part “Back to School” virtual information series providing helpful tips and advice for children going back to class.

To begin Thespina Godshalk, clinical director of School-Based Behavioral Health, discussed emotional health and resiliency.

This is defined as children being able to successfully adapt to change without taking on significant amounts of stress.

“We know that going back to in-person school has been anxiety-producing for a lot of our kids. So what do we do for them to preserve their emotional health and bolster their resiliency?” she asked.

Godshalk said there were four major components to building this emotional resiliency, beginning with acknowledging the emotional impact of a ever-changing and constantly stressful pandemic”

She said it was important to understand things are not perfect right now and one must make the best of the current situation, and that it is important for parents to acknowledge and model this mindset for their children.

She also said adults should be aware of, and acknowledge, children’s emotional distress, as well as any effects from the past year like grief or loss issues.

The second major component Godshalk talked about was setting children up for success, which starts with understanding what is and is not in our control, and then taking steps to feel the most comfortable in situations that could inevitably be stressful.

Steps could include practicing basic self-care and health, taking advantage of preventive measures - such as masking, hand-washing and social distancing - to assuage fears about COVID-19, and preparing for stressful situations.

She said developing a safety plan to provide children with go-to skills to use in a moment of crisis can be very useful, and said such a plan can include establishing coping strategies or behaviors, using calming corners, asking for help from trusted adults, breaking down big tasks, giving extra time for work or extra timeouts.

“What we don’t want is for you to be struggling emotionally and silently.”

Third, Godshalk said it is important for children to maintain connections and keep lines of communication open.

Parents should have emotional check-ins with their child by asking them open-ended questions such as, “Tell me one good thing about your day” or “Tell me one thing you had trouble with today.”

Godshalk also said it is important for parents to pay attention to their child’s verbal and nonverbal responses and feedback, and to also instill a sense of hope in their children by letting them know that “things won’t always be this stressful.”

Fourth, Godshalk said it can be useful to involve supporting services or individuals, when needed, to better a child’s emotional health.

These services can include physicians, teachers and other school personnel, counselors, behavioral health support services, as well as trusted adults such as a coach or activity leader.

The next speaker was pediatric specialist Dr. Sanjeev Vasishtha.

Vasishtha said in his practice he always tries to ask children, “What is one good thing that happened to you last week,” in order to, get them into the habit of recognizing a positive trigger.

“We know and we recognize that they are stressed out, so we try to make them think of one thing that made them happy,” he explained.

Vasishtha said as physicians, he and others monitor children during checkups for anxiety, depression, mental health issues or other stressors, and spoke about ways he engages with his younger patients.

Additionally, Vasishtha explained he asks children if they have found their passion yet in life, which encourages them to open up.

“What’s the passion in life? What have you found that you want to do for the rest of your life?

“It’s just amazing how easily they open up and they want to talk about all their dreams, and their hopes and their fears,” he explained.

Vasishtha said another way of reducing children’s anxiety and nervousness is by practicing mindfulness exercises, particularly with their families, and also encouraged children to mask up and get vaccinated when eligible.

“That’s a fantastic, scientifically-proven thing that can prevent them from getting sick, so why not do it?” he said.

Dr. Hatim Omar, a specialist in adolescent medicine, then spoke about emotional health and resiliency in teenagers.

“Generally teen years are the most difficult in anybody’s life,” he said. “It is the bridge between childhood and adulthood, and it has to achieve specific goals for these kids to get to their adulthood and be productive adults.”

A common misconception among adults, Omar said, is that teens today are different then teens 50 years ago, or 100 years ago.

The fact is teens are exactly the same today like they were 3,000 years ago.

While teenagers have not changed, their surrounding environment has, adding that in the past teenagers had more family connections and cohesiveness.

For example, Omar said in his practice he asks teenagers when the last time was they had a family meal, and noted that 10-20 years ago teens would say, “yesterday or a week ago.

“Now the vast majority of teens look at me like I’m from Mars or something; what does family mean? Families are not getting together, they are not doing something together,” he said.

Omar said research shows that teens, regardless of background, will do fine if they have three basic things - a trusted adult, a safe place to interact with that adult, and something useful to do.

He said teens that have these three components will be less likely to turn to negative behaviors and will have a greater likelihood of succeeding as a productive member of society.

“We cannot build the future for our teens, but we can build our teens for the future,” Omar said, quoting president Franklin D. Roosevelt.

Omar encouraged parents to speak to teens, though he noted a common error parents make is trying to be too formal when speaking.

“Just don’t make it formal,” he advised, adding the most effective way to talk to teens is while doing something else, such as cooking a meal or taking a drive.

“Let them tell you what they feel,” Omar said. “Give them a chance. Don’t interrupt them. Let them talk about all that.”