Dear Jacquelyn,

I recently bumped into a friend that I went to high school with many years ago. We chatted for a short while, but the whole time I couldn’t put a name to the face. I didn’t let on I was struggling to remember the former classmate’s name. We parted ways, but now I’m wondering if I should have just asked? What should you do when struggling to remember a name?

Dear Reader,

We have all experienced that moment of panic when our minds go blank and can’t remember a name. It’s not that we don’t care enough to remember, it’s just we have met a lot of people over the course of our lives.

We can more easily match people to places and events, but names are harder to remember.

You are smart to want to learn how to handle a forgotten name without embarrassment because it’s almost certain it will happen again in the future.

The best approach is to simply be honest. Let the person know upfront that his or her name has slipped your mind. This is the most positive way to recover.

It’s best to keep it simple by saying, “I am so sorry, I have completely blanked on your name.” Don’t make a “thing” out of the fact that you forgot the person’s name. Don’t make an excuse that you’re bad at names, even if you are.

You want to, as quickly as possible, get past the awkwardness of having to ask. Once you’re told the person’s name, respond by using it, for example: “Thank you, Bob!”

Thankfully you weren’t met with “You can’t remember my name, can you?”

If this ever happens, you would respond the same way: “I am so sorry, I completely blanked on you name. Please refresh my memory.”

Remember, any time you are in the midst of an awkward social situation, it’s best met with honesty and a maybe even some humor.

Respectfully Yours,

Jacquelyn

Have a question? Email: jacquelyn@ptd.net. Jacquelyn Youst is owner of the Pennsylvania Academy of Protocol, specializing in etiquette training. She is on the board of directors of the National Civility Foundation.

All Rights Reserved &Copy; 2021 Jacquelyn Youst