As the pandemic begins a second surge during a season that typically includes family gatherings, we are faced with some decisions that challenge us to put things in perspective and count our blessings.

That’s not an easy thing to do fully.

We count our health among our blessings, but we remember those who have lost their battle against the virus.

We count our family among our blessings as well, but we remember those families that will have an empty seat at future get-togethers.

Often, the enormity of all we may have lost this year - things like employment, in-person learning, even the ability to hug our family and friends - feels heavy as we prepare for a holiday that calls on us to be thankful.

Family dinners will likely change slightly, as our health department officials ask that we keep our gatherings small. The number of coronavirus cases continues to increase and data is showing community spread might be to blame.

Thanksgiving at my home will look very different. Only those who live here will gather at the table.

My younger daughter is coming home from college, located in the very county that has the highest number of cases.

She’s been careful, but we know sometimes that’s simply not enough. We will not take any chances, so we will also not spend face-to-face family time with parents or in-laws.

I didn’t struggle with the decision to do this. Keeping our elderly family members safe is paramount.

I did, though, struggle with how everyone would feel about it. How will our parents feel about not being with us?

How will our children feel about the absence of their grandparents? How can we all find ways to be thankful while faced with such stress and such change?

Answers came last week, thanks to an interactive gathering hosted by Northampton Community College via Zoom. Dr. Gina Turner, professor of psychology at NCC, presented “What Can We Be Thankful For? Stories of Resilience and Hope in 2020.” This was the guidance I had been searching for.

According to the announcement of the event, “gratitude is a powerful tool that we can use to face even the most stressful life and world events.”

“This is kind of a special year,” Turner said at the start of the presentation. “This is a particularly stressful year.”

Indeed.

According to Turner, three significant events in 2020 likely brought on our high levels of stress: the pandemic, the election and the social unrest across the country. It has us on overload, she said.

Trying to find gratitude during such tumultuous times is critical to carrying us through them. And that involves things like social support, positivity, mindfulness, communication and even humor.

“Gratitude has lasting benefits for individual health and well-being as well as for community strength and well-being,” Turner said.

She offered a personal example of finding gratitude amidst conflict. She and a group of friends had planned a trip out west earlier this year, but the pandemic forced a cancellation of travel.

Instead, they “made the best of it,” gathering locally in a backyard, socially distanced. It’s a memory she’ll cherish, she said, because they managed to form a sense of community in their own way.

I learned from Turner the importance of forging ahead, of making the very most of this holiday of thankfulness.

“Stop, take a moment and take stock,” she said. “Appreciate where we are and what we have. Delight in the preciousness of every single moment of our life.”

Instead of calling this time the new normal, let’s choose to do something a little different, just for now. So years later, when we talk about this pandemic, we can say, “Remember that Thanksgiving, when we ... ?” and the ending of that statement brings a smile to our faces because we made a new memory created through our resilience.

We have two weeks to prepare a plan for the holiday. Turner encouraged us to ask ourselves these questions: What is most important to me? What are the things I value most? If it’s family time, make it work responsibly, without putting anyone’s health and well-being at risk.

This year, my family will “make the best of it” by enjoying dessert remotely with our extended family. Pumpkin pie via Zoom will be our 2020 Thanksgiving memory.

I’m thankful that my family, all of them, understands the importance of changing our dinner plans this year.

I’m thankful that, collectively, we value each other’s health and well-being over a holiday meal around a common table.

This season, I’m also thankful for Zoom. Oh - and pumpkin pie.

Kelly Lutterschmidt

editor

Whitehall-Coplay Press

Northampton Press

Catasauqua Press