Editor’s Note: Respectfully Yours is a new column on etiquette that will appear in the Focus section of Lehigh Valley Press.

Q. Recently I went on a business dinner with a client that I’ve been trying to connect with for a long time. The meeting was going smoothly up to when our dinner was served. Both my client and I ordered steak as the main entree.

My steak was served well-done but I ordered it rare, so naturally I sent it back. It took longer than I thought to redo my steak and it ended up being served a half hour later.

That being said, my client had already finished his meal and I ended up eating while my client sat waiting. This created an awkward situation. What was I supposed to do to avoid this uncomfortable situation?

Sincerely,

Dinner Dilemna

Dear Dinner Dilemna,

This is one of the few times I recommend playing with your food. A business dinner is not about the food, but about being able to handle yourself with decorum. I’m giving you permission to play with your food ... just this once.

Having a meal prepared properly is always ideal but sometimes things can go awry.

Food aside, the goal of a business dinner is to make a connection and forge a relationship. In our fiercely competitive job market, the business dinner is the one place you can’t afford to get it wrong.

The key is to not make the dinner solely about the food, but about presenting yourself with social skills that essentially “boil over” into business. What has worked for you at the family table may have served you just fine but could possibly cost you a coveted deal.

Keep in mind, the business dinner is a stage to display your dining savvy. To keep the business dinner flowing, on time, and respectful, there is a proper way to handle this.

Plan ahead. Eat something light before dinner so you are not ravenous. This will take your own focus off the actual meal so you are able to focus on the situation at hand.

For future dinner meetings, I would suggest not sending food back. This lag time leaves a client eating alone and, in return, creates an uncomfortable setting.

I recommend keeping your entree and eating around it. Move the food around, eat the side dishes and sip your drink.

Maintain a pace that is in sync with your guest and make them feel comfortable.

The goal is to make a connection with the coveted client and distinguish yourself from the competition.

Respectfully Yours,

Jacquelyn

Jacquelyn Youst is owner of Jacquelyn Youst Etiquette Consulting, specializing in protocol training. She works with the National Civility Foundation. Have a question? Email: jacquelyn@ptd.net