I am always last - last to arrive, last to leave, last to get served at a banquet. Sometimes it happens due to my own fault, like because I am running late. But many times, if not most, I am at the end of the line because I tend to hang around and talk. I always seem to find someone to connect with, even in a room full of strangers. It is both a blessing and a curse. I even had the lights turned off on me at a viewing once. “Mom’s last call at the funeral home” is one of those family stories that will go down in history. Truth be told, I was catching up with a cousin I had not seen in years.

History repeated itself recently at the end of a breakfast meeting I was attending. I was the last one to leave - again. I was in a conversation with two people I had not seen in a while, along with someone I had just met that day. They actually sought me out as I was trying to gather my things and leave - I swear! They wanted to talk more about something I said during the discussion that morning.

The speaker at the event was addressing the topic of self care for those who work in people-serving professions. One point she noted was so often people in the helping professions support others in reaching their goals to the point that they neglect their own aspirations. She dared us to write down one personal goal for 2017, along with the steps we would need to take to reach that goal. We also were asked to share how we deal with the challenges and distractions that come and derail us from the dream train. People offered ideas ranging from positive self talk to establishing a support network - from yoga and music to running and famous quotations.

I had two thoughts brewing in my mind, and I decided to take the leap and share what I honestly do when I am up against a wall. I shared my favorite scripture verse. I wasn’t sure what kind of reaction I was going to get, but it turned out to be very positive. There were even shouts of “Amen!” from some in the room. The speaker then affirmed that faith, prayer and belief in a higher power are very important coping and resiliency strategies. However, we seldom bring it up because of the sensitive nature of the topic. But since the suggestion came from the audience, the taboo had been removed in this case. And it was brought up in the context of “Here is what I do when I am discouraged,” not “This is what you should do.”

There is where the difference lies. Much research supports the claim about faith and belief in a higher being that the speaker made. We know when youth participate in a faith-related activity such as worship service or youth group, they are more resilient and less likely to get in trouble. So, why are we not talking about it?

That’s what my colleagues wanted to discuss at the end of the breakfast. When social workers and counselors work with individuals and families, why are we not being holistic and asking where they derive their strength? While we help people assess their physical, mental, intellectual and social dimensions, why have we placed such a taboo on discussing where people find themselves spiritually, especially when we know that it contributes to one’s ability to weather life’s storms in healthy, productive ways?

It seems our concern with political correctness has caused us to put a gag order on some of the very information that is critical to a person’s development. My colleagues and I agreed the pendulum needs to swing back to a point where spiritual development can be approached as a protective factor and a resource.

I was one of the last folks to leave the event that day, which of course made me a bit behind for my next meeting. But I just kept reminding myself a wise person once said the first will be last and the last will be first.

Editor’s note: Denise Continenza is the family and consumer sciences educator with Penn State Extension, Lehigh and Northampton counties.