As I was preparing for a program on school readiness, I decided I needed some new material. For years I had been using the same old items to demonstrate how parents can teach skills and concepts to their soon-to-be kindergartner using simple items found in the home.

There are two main messages being conveyed to the parents: You are your child's first and best teacher; and preparing your child for kindergarten need not cost a lot of money.

I sat back in my chair and looked around my house to see what new and exciting items I might use and what corresponding skills could be taught. The hurricane vase on the dining room table caught my attention. Inside the curvy glass, colorful plastic eggs lay comfortably on puffy cellophane grass. What amazing things can be taught with these decorations! And they are quite plentiful at the time of year when spring arrives and parents of 5-year-olds suddenly realize that their child is kindergarten-bound.

I went to the dollar store to pick up a couple bags of plastic eggs and began planning how I would conduct an activity for parents using them. The big question would be, "What can you teach your child using these inexpensive plastic eggs?" I would make sure that their responses included not only the cognitive (i.e., colors, counting, shape recognition, etc.), but also skills in the areas of social-emotional, learning and physical. I had examples of each so that they could expand their thinking about how broad and really easy it is to teach your child school-readiness skills by playing with everyday items.

And that was when I had an epiphany. One of the cognitive skills that children need to develop is the ability to sort items and recognize differences. We teach this to children. "Find all the pink eggs," we might say. Or "let's count how many yellow eggs we have." We actually want children to be able to see differences between things. Being able to categorize helps children make sense of the world. But somewhere along the line, children seem to learn that differences have meaning. No one ever says, "The pink eggs are better than the yellow ones." They are just different.

So, where do children get the idea that another child who looks different, dresses differently or learns in a unique way is somehow of lesser value other children? Should we make our children blind to the differences around us so that they can see everyone and everything as an individual entity? I have to wonder if the human brain is simply wired to search for a way to connect like items.

It was then that I realized my workshop was missing a very important piece of information. For all the effort I had put into making sure the program addressed all domains of school readiness, I never thought about talking to parents about how important it is that they watch how they speak about people, families, lifestyles or practices that are different from their own. It is possible to convey your own values without passing judgment on others. Teaching about differences in a way that does not insult the person or the group to which they belong is constructive. Doing otherwise lays a foundation for confusion and stereotyping. And these are often at the root of bullying.

Parents are often very concerned about their child's readiness for school. They want them to have all thinking skills and concepts in place that they need for school success. But school success goes beyond the classroom and into the world. As the summer rolls by and parents of young children give one final push to help their child enter kindergarten on solid ground, pay attention to what you say about the differences you see around you. Do you assign value or pass judgment? Are you communicating a message that stereotypes people or groups?

Remember, you are your child's first, best and most respected teacher. And they are listening and watching.