Do you ever wonder why people act the way they do? Why do you get along with some people and not others?

As a realtor, I deal with people all day long. A few years ago, one of my real estate classes included a section explaining people's personalities to help agents relate to different types of clients.

Though there are tons of articles and books on the subject, I found the DISC Personality Types to be very interesting and easy to understand.

According to DISC, there are four basic – Dominance, Influence, Steadiness and Conscientiousness. Everyone has all four of these qualities, but one usually is the predominant. It is important to realize that there are no "good" or "bad" personality styles. I will briefly describe the four groups and you can see where you and your family/friends fit in.

Ds are self-starters, very competitive, very direct, blunt and have extremely positive attitudes. They can make fast decisions, talk fast, and are always busy, efficient and structured. Usually, known as control freaks, they like to win and go from point A to point B very quickly. Typically, they are great delegators, leaders and can inspire others.

Ds tell more than ask; talk more than listen; have a forceful tone, give a firm handshake, make steady eye contact, display impatience and are fast moving. They have a low tolerance for feelings, attitudes and advice from others.

People in the I category are those everyone wants to be around – the life of the party. They are extremely, outgoing, love to talk and make great socializers. Always dressed fashionably – sometimes outrageously – they talk fast, have tons of friends, like to drop names of people they know and are very entertaining and sincere. Normally working quickly and excitedly with others, they exaggerate and generalize. Their workspaces are usually cluttered.

Those in the I group tell stories, share personal feelings, digress from the conversation, are dramatic and loud, have animated facial expression and have a lot of hand and body movement and are very spontaneous. They do not like being alone.

The Steadiness group is made up of people who are warm hearted, easy going, neighborly and always want to help and make sure you are OK. Always putting others before themselves, both personal and work relationships are important. They like to be needed and are great team players. Several family pictures will be showcased. They are oversensitive and dislike conflict. These disputes are never forgotten and they will hold grudges for a long time.

People with the S personality ask more than tell, listen more than talk and have a less forceful tone and slower speech. They have intermittent eye contact, a gentle handshake, are very patient and slow moving.

Those with the Conscientious personality type are analytical. Everything is to be precise and they like to calculate and rethink things many times. Always extremely organized, Cs are very orderly, neat, cautious and conservative. Cs are thorough and like to plan. They want more information and are slower at making decisions. Sometimes they are too rigid and do not like people criticizing them.

Cs are fact and task oriented, very rarely share their feelings and are formal and proper. Their speech is steady and has low volume.

If people talk fast, they are either a D or an I. If they talk more slowly, they are usually an S or a C.

Opposites usually do not get along very well. Ds think the Ss are too slow and the Ss think the Ds are rude. Cs like order and don't get along with those in the I group. Those in the I group like to have fun and find Cs boring.

I am a D – the dominating one. We are least liked because we are bossy. Direct people like me, are to the point and very blunt. We do hurt people's feelings without knowing it, but we have big hearts and will help someone whenever we can.

The class was fun because you realized if you drove up to a home where the yard was very well cared for and manicured, then one of the owners had a C personality. If someone had each grade of their kids' school pictures going up the steps, someone was an S. If the seller or buyer was short with answers, they were a D. If they wanted to schedule around their social life to look at houses, then you knew you were working with an I.

It's a good thing for the public to understand. You need to work with the other person's personality to get along. I use the DISC in all phases of life – work, volunteer, church, family and friends.

Once you understand that there are personality differences, you will know how to adjust your speech and mannerisms to relate to them. I know some families where the D, a parent, is bossy and does not know why the child is so slow at making decisions. This is because they are an S and want to please or a C and need to analyze and have their facts before responding. Again Ds and Ss are opposites as are Is and Cs and the opposites get on each other's nerves.

Below are suggestions to get along with the four types.

D – Priorities are making money, saving time and becoming more efficient. Be to the point and direct. Because they are time disciplined, make your conversation short and to the point.

I – Priorities are prestige, recognition and image. Enhancing these items, you will be their best friend forever. Keep your conversations light and exciting or an I will become quickly bored.

S – Priorities are looking for the touchy-feely relationship. Support them and their families. Do not be confrontational or expect change.

C – Priorities are logical and accurate information, being reliable and honest. They won't take you seriously unless they feel you actually know what you are talking about.

No matter what your personality type, the important thing to remember and understand is not every one is like you. Remember you have to recognize the personality traits that make each of us unique and adapt your personality around their type. People are all different and recognizing this helps create harmony.

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Shari Noctor is a local real estate agent.